1.4 – The One With Magic Hands

FOUR

Last time I left with Lori about to have her first baby – the potential heir/heiress for Generation Two!
Nothing much else really happened last post, so I’ll get on with it.

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Unfortunately for Lori, Joel turned up in time to leap into the taxi with her.

Joel: DRIVE, PUDDING FACE WOMAN.

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Meet our potential heiress! Ella Gordon, born with the trait friendly locked in, and rolled SOMETHING as her second trait. Her favourite colour is turquoise like her father, and she likes ratatouille and music!

I also have custom content burrito wraps so the babies aren’t just plain blue and pink (which is actually kind of sexist/stereotypical).

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Lori: Oh god, what have I done?

You made a baby. You’re supposed to be happy.

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Joel: Don’t worry Ella, I’ll look after you.

It’s obvious to me that Ella has Lori’s skin tone and that’s pretty fun.

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Lori: CHILD STOP SCREAMING.

Fun fact: Ella did not stop screaming unless she was otherwise occupied or asleep. I nearly gave up on the game I hated her so much.

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What’s this? Joel’s mother and brother? Must be a huge mistake party!

I really hate the screaming wrap stage, so I only have it set to a day.

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Lori: Hi Ms Vidal, I’m Lori Gordon, your daughter in law.

Valerie: Ah, so you’re the girl who stole my son away from Holly Alto.

Lori: … Excuse me?

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After that sufficiently awkward encounter, Valerie helped herself to some pancakes and Sean started washing up. Joel took control of the birthday situation, as Lori was too busy trying to gain control of her mouth.

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Some random girl showed up (I didn’t invite her – I checked) and started heckling Joel and clogging up the doorway, while everybody else complained about Ella.

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And I mean everybody.

Sean: Hurrrr caaakeee.

See both the before and after pictures in the thoughts? I’m such a lazy simmer.

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Lori: Will you shut up already, child?

Her name is Ella. That’s your daughter.

Lori: Whatever.

Bella: Somebody get that creep Sean out of my house before I forcibly remove his –

MOVING ON!

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I tried for ages to get a decent after picture of Ella, and this is the best I could get.

I know, it sucks. But she’s pretty cute, despite the fact she very clearly has Joel’s fucked up tiny eyes…

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However, she is cursed with the evil satan spawn that is an Imaginary Friend. And I’m too nice to take it away from her just now. That and toddler sims are incredibly boring so she probably wouldn’t get much attention if it wasn’t for that thing.

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Saying that…

Lori: Hey, you’re not that bad! You don’t look like a burrito cosplay any more!

‘Burrito cosplay’. I seriously hope that’s something I never have to see.

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VIRTUOSO. That was her second trait! I seriously got lucky with this kid if I’m being perfectly honest. I could’ve got stuck with some sucky trait but I got a pretty good one for money making! (now I ain’t sayin’ she a gold digger)

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Well, maybe.

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Lori: If you don’t stop screaming while I’m trying to sleep, I’m going to knock you out.

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Again, more victims needed for magic practise, so off to the Fall Festival to practise on some poor unsuspecting souls!

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In a fit of desperation, I made Bella come to the park to give Lori a skill boost, and set her about upgrading the various speakers in the park.

This is how you play the sims, right?

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Not sure what the purpose of this photo was exactly… maybe one last look at her youthful face and her wand becaaaaause…

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The “Most Awkward Place To Have A Birthday” award goes to Lori Gordon for “The Bathroom with The Dirty Toilet”!

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This time, both my sims seem to lose control of their lower jaw.

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She looks exactly the same, just with a few lines. I’m happy with that 🙂

Lori: Wait, now I’m an adult does that mean I have… responsibilities?

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Outside, I found this rather confused zombie prowling around.

Zombie: Can I swim in that trough?

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Presenting to you; LORI “MAGIC HANDS” GORDON!

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Which you already knew because of the chapter title and card, but whatever. I used 20,000 of her Lifetime Happiness points to buy her this!

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Ella is not forgotten, Joel took on the second task of teaching her to walk. Probably a good thing, as his relationship panel shows that he barely even knows who she is.

Awkward.

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Ella: I do not want to walk towards that creepy hand…

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Joel: YEEEEHAAAAAAAW!

Hera: Please stop.

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Joel: PRINCE CHARMING AT YOUR SERVICE!

Hera: Stop.

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Reasons why you should pay attention to your sims at all times – I nearly missed Joel’s birthday because I wasn’t paying attention.

Did Hera kick your kneecap in for being retarded or something…?

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Joel: Duuur, I’m an adult!

You baby, you don’t need a midlife crisis!

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As you can see by the fact we’ve gone back in time – my game crashed.

Luckily, I save a lot so I only lost about half an hours worth of time! And then I fast forwarded through the rest of everything.

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Lori: Nothing to see here!

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Lori: Literally nothing to see.

I hope you die of smoke inhalation.

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Valerie Vidal: Maybe smelling your hair will relieve me from the stress that is seeing my son become uncomfortably close with his horse just outside the window.

Ella: I have no idea who you are. Please unhand me.

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Extended family and excess food? Must be that party time again!

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I struggled for so long to get a photo of Ella cutely blowing out the candles without Joel’s ugly face in the picture.

Sorry Joel!

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I never got an after picture of her age up, apparently, but one cool thing I discovered while attending to somebody else in the household – Ella sings in the shower.

A child after my own heart.

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Tadaaah!

Ella: I feel stupid.

Well, you look adorable.

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She rolled artistic as her third trait, making me extraordinarily lucky and then immediately buy an easel for Ella to be chained to practise on!

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Joel’s getting pretty close to mastering the riding skill now, so here’s a random photo of him looking very dapper as he goes galloping around the neighbourhood.

I must’ve had a reason for taking this, but all my notes say is “level 8”.

Thanks Liv!

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Despite how I’ve shown their relationship (or not, as the case may be), their bar is actually full and they do cute mother-daughter shit like this all the time when I’m not looking.

Love it.

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Ah yes, the infamous Devil Spawn known as “Patterns”. Apparently she built up enough of a relationship with it to turn it ‘real’ and make it do this.

I still have nightmares about these creatures.

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Ella: I’m learning to read sheet music to help me when I become a teen and can actually play an instrument, despite the fact that children in the real world play instruments and our very own author has been playing the piano since she was seven years old.

Cough cough, EA, cough cough.

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Even though these fuckers are supposed to be imaginary and are invisible to everybody else in the household, Joel still somehow knew that Patterns was blocking the way to the fridge.

Patterns: LOL Joel!

Joel: It’s all the time I’ve spent with Lori, you learn a thing or two about supernaturals.

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About 50 eons ago, Joel was given the “opportunity” to repair some old guys stereo, and return it for simoleons.

Apparently ‘repair’ equates to ‘jam a screwdriver into the front of it until it works or I get electrocuted and die’. Whatever makes you happy, Joel.

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Bella: Finally, Lori remembers me enough to take care of me.

Lori: lol whut?

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I finally managed to get Joel to the equestrian centre on time for a racing competition! I’m too cheap to buy jumps so Hera has never so much as seen a pole, but all of the galloping around town has boosted her to a high racing skill.

Hera: I refuse to run with your butt singing like that.

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Joel: We won! We won the beginner and the advanced races and earned over 2000 simoleons for doing it!

Hera: We? I think you mean I. I’m the one who galloped around the track while you sat on my back yelling “gee up”.

And I finally figured out a way to make money >:D (but she ain’t messin with no broke niggers)

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Oh yeah, Joel’s now such a proficient rider that he can ride a horse bareback!

Not like I’ve been able to do that since I was ten years old or anything…

Joel: Shut up, I only took up horse riding a week ago.

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Joel came home to, uh, ‘celebrate’ his victory in the races with Hera, and it looks like Ella’s going to have a brother or sister to compete with in the run for Heir/Heiress.

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Bella: THAT’S ALL FOLKS!

I have nothing to say after this post other than apologise for how over the place and unorganised my screencaps are. I can’t remember why I took half of these and I’m completely exhausted so my writing is not at it’s best.

2 thoughts on “1.4 – The One With Magic Hands

  1. Stupid IFs and their their invisible blocking of stuff the real sims want to use. Mine tend to block bathrooms and cause sims to pee themselves. I’ve taken to putting them in parents’ inventory once the toddler grows up, don’t want any more in the house.

    I love Ella’s look, she has a great mix of Joel and Lori. And Lori is of course gorgeous with her freckles. I don’t use freckles enough on my sims.

    Like

    • After the glitches I suffered with this lot, I’m never having another IF again….
      Until like gen four when I forget that I said that and accidentally let them out of the mailbox and all hell breaks loose!
      I was so happy with Ella’s look, though the tiny eyes did throw me a little bit haha!

      Like

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